Mahar Receives Apology from U.S. Democrats

I wrote a series of posts about public apologies awhile back. Yesterday I saw a riff on apologies in the NY Times and wondered whether to bring it to your attention.

Today there is an apology from the U.S. House of Representatives to Mahar Arar. This is an apology that is owed by the U.S. government and the Bush administration. We may have to treasure this one a long time before we hear one from the government.

Since the Universe is aligning around apology, here we go.

From the report in the Toronto Star:

>After his release, Arar returned to Canada and Ottawa has since apologized to him for its role in the affair and agreed to pay him almost $10 million in compensation.

>The Bush administration has not apologized.

>"Let me personally give you what our government has not: an apology," said Bill Delahunt, D-Mass., as he opened the hearing.

>"Let me apologize to you and the Canadian people for our government's role in a mistake."

NY Times column, Regrets Only, created from published apologies.

My series on Apology:

Ths Simple Approach to Apology Works
Apology, the Unknown Universe
Apology 3

Medical/Legal Apology

There is a movement afoot to make it possible to apologize for your actions without being considered to admit that you have done a wrong with legal consequences:

1

Apology Act of B.C., May 2006

http://www.leg.bc.ca/38th2nd/1st_read/m202-1.htm

first in Canada, several in US states

2

Since mandatory apologies provide little comfort, they are seldom ordered by adjudicators. Yet Ombudsmen receive sacks of mail saying: 'I just wanted an apology, I'm not so interested
in compensation.'

3

Doctors Advised: An Apology a Day Keeps the Lawyer Away

The Associated Press

"Say you're sorry when you hurt someone. The medical world is finding that childhood lesson a surprisingly powerful way to head off malpractice suits, especially if the apology comes with an upfront settlement offer. Since encouraging its doctors to apologize for errors, the University of Michigan Health System's annual attorney fees have dropped by two-thirds, and malpractice suits and notices of intents to sue have fallen by half, says a former trial attorney who launched the practice there...

While the number of settlements would probably increase, lawsuits and sky-high jury awards would decrease, said Doug Wojcieszak, a public relations consultant whose victims' rights group proposed "Sorry Works."

Apologies and upfront financial offers could mean the difference between settlements costing thousands of dollars and drawn-out malpractice lawsuits costing millions in attorney fees and jury awards, Wojcieszak said.

The idea for "Sorry Works" came from an honesty policy the Veterans Affairs hospital in Lexington, Ky., adopted in 1987 after two big malpractice cases cost the hospital over $1.5 million.

Dr. Steve Kraman, then the hospital's chief of staff, said he helped create the policy as an alternative to the traditional "shut up and fight" strategy. The center's liability costs subsequently dropped below those of comparable VA hospitals, he said."

4

In the medical/legal field: movement news at The Sorry Works Coalition

http://www.sorryworks.net

5

Legislating apology in the context of medical mistakes

Apologies fall into two discrete categories: expressions of sympathy or benevolence (eg, I'm sorry you are hurt) and expressions of accountability and remorse (eg, I'm sorry I hurt you)...

6

Medical honesty is the best policy:article describing apology policy

Apology - 3

This is the third in the series on apology. It is fortuitus that I found another blog entry just today on Public Apology.

For a look at the apology in the public arena, three items,
one from Harvard Business Review and two from Bernaisesauce.

HB Working Knowledge, A Framework for Apologies

by Barbara Kellerman

Here are some questions that can guide your approach.

• What function would a public apology serve?
• Who would benefit from an apology?
  
• Why would an apology matter?
  
• What happens if you apologize publicly?
  
• What happens if you don't apologize?

from "When Should a Leader Apologize—and When Not?" Harvard Business Review, Vol. 84, No. 4, April 2006.

And from Bernaise Source

Apologizing in the New Media Age… quoting DPK Public Relations

Why Apologies Are A Crisis Communications Staple

• Take responsibility as soon as possible. Apologize as soon after the offense as possible.
• Describe what you did. Don't be vague or use euphemisms that attempt to tidy up your mess. A short, direct statement is perfect followed by a brief explanation of the circumstances surrounding it to provide context.
• Express remorse. Make your apology as heartfelt as you can without assuming liability. Tone is important here. The statement must reflect genuine remorse.
• Shut up. Afterward, be quiet and listen while people tell you how angry they are. If it's really bad, they'll call for your head. Know that you've done the right thing and time is on your side.
• Make it right. In such situations, what you DO always trumps what you SAY. Therefore, symbolic gestures matter. Your attempts to correct the problem and compensate those who have been wronged are essential. However, be careful not to promise more than you can deliver…

And again from bernaisesauce an entertaining rif on the sincerity of recent public apologies:

Apology Notes: A Rating Sytem

Red heart – heart felt apology accompanied by meaningful
change in action beyond what was expected

Clear heart – the apology is sincere, with no game changing
action beyond what was expected

Broken heart – meaningless apology mailed in by a PR
department or publicist where bad actions continue

The Simple Approach to Apology Works

This is my second posting on Apology.

Thanks to Kenneth W. Davis at Manage Your Writing for summarizing the article at Fast Company:

Apologize? Who me? By John Baldoni

"To make apologies meaningful, Baldoni offers four rules:

1. Be sincere.
2. Admit what you did was wrong.
3. Accept the consequences.
4. Make it right."

Life Coach Dolly M. Garlo had this to say about apologies to colleagues in her article published in the Texas Bar Journal

Creating a Collaborative Law Office

"Make only those agreements that you are intend to keep. Think how often someone else counts on something you say and avoid making such comments lightly.

Communicate about a potential broken agreement at the first appropriate opportunity. This demonstrates you are a steward of your word.

Similarly, clear up any broken agreement at the first appropriate opportunity; don’t avoid it or wait to see if you will be challenged. Acknowledge your responsibility with an apology."

Apology -- the Unknown Universe

I have been collecting bits of information on the subject of apology and I decided it was finally time to share them. But I found I have way too much for one post, so I am dividing it up into 4 posts:

1. This one, which is an excerpt from a chapter, I wrote for a continuing legal education manual on law practice management.
2. All about written apologies
3. Public apologies in the media age
4. The legal movement to use apologies with or without litigation

The client has a problem with your services

When a client becomes dissatisfied with your services or has a particular complaint, do what you can to resolve it.

Even before investigating the complaint, and taking steps to find a resolution, there are three-steps you can take with a complaining client:

1. Acknowledge the complaint

2. Respect the individual

3. Offer a preliminary response

a) Empathize with the problem or consequences, or

b) Sympathize with the person, or

c) Apologize for your mistake or oversight, or

d) Offer any sincere combination of these.

Acknowledging that there is a complaint means not stonewalling and not avoiding the client's calls. It means receiving the complaint but it does not automatically involve an acceptance of the validity of the complaint. Acknowledgment moves the complaint process forward.

Respecting the individual, if not the substance of the complaint, is crucial to resolving the dispute. Now is not the time to chronicle your own list of complaints about the client. Show restraint toward the client's emotional involvement in the dispute, and respect for the person. Don't do or say anything to malign or denigrate the individual just because the client has complained about you.

The third stage in addressing the complaint depends on the nature of the complaint and the degree to which you can genuinely express these sentiments in the circumstances:

a) Empathize with how the person feels.

If the person has become frustrated and annoyed because you have been unable to return calls, you can easily say that you would feel the same in the reverse circumstance. This is a means of acknowledging the person's feelings without necessarily validating the complaint.

b) Sympathize with the person's plight.

Even if you cannot identify with the other person's feelings (to empathize), you can find the internal resources to sympathize (to support the person and take a share of their discomfort). "I sympathize with your plight... unfortunately, it is unavoidable."

c) Apologize.

If you have made a simple mistake, accept responsibility and apologize. Apologize when that course of action is available to you. You know the difference between a mistake that incurs legal liability, and a mere client relations snafu.

d) If you can empathize, sympathize, and apologize, do it all.

Sometimes all that is necessary is an intermediary or go-between who is not emotionally involved.

Always follow up with the client after a complaint is resolved. And analyze it to learn from your experience.